Sprouting Self-Acceptance and Talking More Bollocks Than Usual!

Ever found yourself spellbound by the simple act of watching chickens peck at the ground or felt your spirits lifted by the sight of your garden flourishing? This is exactly where our latest conversation takes us, sweeping through the delights of connecting with nature and the earthy charm of self-sufficiency. As the sun kisses our cheeks, we chat about the possibility of raising chickens and the tender art of cultivating a garden, considering the space we have and how practical our pastoral dreams might be. We delve into the ethics of keeping animals and the profound peace found in gardening, weaving in personal tales that highlight our journey and growth.

Doubtless, the stories we craft about our lives are stitched into the fabric of our daily existence, sometimes so tightly they seem indistinguishable from reality. I recall a memory that shaped my perception of family relationships and how the language we use can sometimes mask the truth. We grapple with the narratives handed down to us and the ones we've spun ourselves, recognizing their weight on our emotional well-being. Our dialogue wades through the complexities of self-acceptance, underscoring the importance of scrutinizing the words we use to describe our experiences, and the courage it takes to rewrite the chapters of our lives.

For the grand finale of our heartfelt exchange, we touch on the delicate balance of responsibility in our interactions. The power of language takes the spotlight as we acknowledge the moments we choose to pass the baton of control to others, and the chilly void it can sometimes leave behind. As the episode winds to a close, we invite you to carry the warmth of our conversation with you, hoping it sparks a flame of positivity as you navigate through the tapestry of your day. So, here's to growth, understanding, and the beauty of a life well-reflected – may this episode be a companion on your path.

Here are the links we were talking about:

The word fuck video:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_tRGD2Jn7I8

The TedTalk: https://youtu.be/RKK7wGAYP6k?si=pARcUxgojYRwuM3m


Love Lynne and Tracey xx 

Chapters

• 0:00 Random Conversations About Chickens and Gardens
• 8:57 The Impact of Our Stories
• 18:00 Self-Acceptance and Personal Comfort
• 25:38 Challenging Self-Talk and Language
• 41:31 Delegating Responsibility to You

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:43

Hello, hello, how are you this afternoon? How the devil are you? Do you know what I'm good the sun is beaming through this window and it feels so lovely to see some sunshine. I know it's a little windy. It is good, I know, blowing the cobwebs away, as they say, just to feel a bit of warmth. Yeah, it's nice, isn't it? I tell you honestly, long, be all British and I know I'm talking about it start with the weather. We like a bit of weather. Oh, it is nice, though, isn't it? Oh, it does make you feel better, though, doesn't it? Yes, a feel-good feeling, it is a nice top up. The vitamin d always makes you feel a bit better. Yeah, yeah, so how you been diddling, all right, good, yeah, same old, same old.

Speaker 1: 1:31

Really not much to tell. Oh, I think I've done a bit exciting, but I'm sure it would have jumped out at me if I had. I was thinking you were going to come out with some exciting story then about you know what you've been up to and where you've been, and who with? And no, george Clooney or Brad Pitt. Would it be George Clooney or Brad Pitt? No, who would it be? Johnny Depp, of course. Oh God, you stupid woman of Christ. Do you know who that is? I can't believe I forgot it was Johnny fucking Depp, his only one. I can't believe I forgot it was him. I can't believe I forgot it was him. No, I'm not a George Clooney or a Brad Pitt fan. No, I just don't. To be honest, I think I'm just not a male fan in general anymore. Okay, do you have something to tell me? Okay, this is where we get deep and meaningful about the language and the stories we've been telling ourselves. No, nothing exciting. What about you? No, apart from I've been planting seeds. Oh, I've been out in my garden. Nice, it's starting to look really nice. What have you planted? So what have I planted? Runner beans, lettuce, beetroot, spring onions, peas, cabbages, rocket spinach, carrots. And up in my bedroom is that your bum ringing? Yeah, my doorbell is just popping in the back of my head and then up in my bedroom. Is that your bum ringing? Yeah, my doorbell's just off. And then up in my bedroom, starting is tomatoes, cucumber and butternut squash Bloody hell. And watercress. I'm having a go at watercress, bloody hell.

Speaker 1: 3:23

I'm going to have some chickens next time. Oh, I would love chickens. I've just not got room for chickens. Can you have two chickens, I don't know. I suppose they don't need a lot of room for chickens. No, you don't. Well, I wanted chickens, but everybody said, oh, you don't want chickens because chicken shit smells. Chicken shit's really good for your garden, by the way it is, you can buy chicken shit pellets. If you only had two chickens, they wouldn't shit that much. No, just run around the garden, love it, pick up on me little insects and stuff so they don't eat me.

Speaker 1: 3:54

Veggies. Yeah, you should get some chickens. I'd like some chickens, do it. I'd like pigs as well, but clearly I've not got enough room for pigs. Do we have bacon then? Well, you do, I don't. Yeah, but would we have bacon then? Well, you do, I do, but would we have bacon? If you have pigs? John would. Yeah, yeah, get some pizza, like a bit of bacon, because we've talked about it. I would love.

Speaker 1: 4:16

This might not be a conversation people like I just thought we're out loud here, sorry, sorry. Big medium vegans, big vegans, vegans what are vegans, vegans and vegetarians? I'm one, I am semi, so just yeah, but he would. Yeah, he's like. But the trouble is, you would just want them as pets and I'm like, yeah, but I'm not the one that's going to eat them. So I would still name them. But, yeah, random, random, there you go. Anyway, that's not what we've been talking about with gardening and vegetarian and veganism.

Speaker 1: 4:59

See, that's a story. We're talking language and stories in there. I have this idea in my head, this story. I'm going to tell myself that I have chickens and pigs and, but you could have them, I could, just not in my garden. Why not? There isn't enough room for pigs in my garden. No, no, no, maybe not pigs. Chickens yeah, you have chickens. I know people do Random story, and this one is true. I've not made this up. I know people do random story and this one is true, I've not made this up.

Speaker 1: 5:29

When I saw a counsellor when my dad died, we got to talking about chickens. One day we spent a whole session talking about chickens and he lived in I think it was Thomas Street, by the railway, where we live and the gardens are. I used to live there. I did. That was my first house. No, really, yeah, I didn't know that. Well, there you go. That's a true story. That's another true story. I used to.

Speaker 1: 5:56

When I was out caring in the community, I used to go and see an old lady in thomas street. That's so weird, yeah, but anyway, he had chickens in. Yeah, his garden wasn't very big. He had lived in an old victorian house, like I was gonna say. This garden is where postage stamp is. My dad used to call that postage stamp. But it's you cat, you are right, you can't have. So I'm telling myself that you can't have chickens because our garden's big enough. You're telling me that's not true.

Speaker 1: 6:25

You say that when we moved out to north pevey in that house, it was in our conveyance plans that we weren't allowed to have chickens. Why don't know? Because of the chicken ship, possibly, or the noise, don't know. You don't need a cockerel to have chickens, do you eggs? Just said we weren't allowed to keep chickens. I wonder why. I don't know when they were built, when the days were, oh my God, I wonder why. See, I can treat now.

Speaker 1: 7:13

See, my dad had racing pigeons. See, that would have been annoying if you had a neighbour with racing pigeons, I reckon, because they would poop everywhere, wouldn't they? Yeah, john got annoyed On Sunday. He jet-washed the path that goes in our garden because it had gone a bit green. Oh, for god's sake. I was like what is it? Bloody birds. Just shut on. You ain't gonna stop that, mate. Why do birds always shit on clean things? It's like they do on purpose. I'm sure they fly up and go. Ha ha look, but wouldn't you? I would, absolutely every time. If you were a pigeon, yes, if I were a pigeon I'd go. Yeah, not as a person, if I was flying powers. Next time you come running, john's gonna go. For fuck's sake, tracy, shut up the path. No, look here, we're going anywhere with this composition. No, look here, we're going anywhere with this conversation we're going to. You've got some weird. Oh my God, this is not where we were going. That's because we haven't got a clue what we're going to talk about today. See, so you're just getting random shit from us instead. Literally, literally.

Speaker 1: 8:57

We were going to try and talk about stories that we told ourselves and the impact that the stories and the language we use on ourselves. We were, weren't we? We've gone down this whole different route. Yeah, I forgot about that. We only talked about that about 15 minutes ago. No, we did. Oh dear, oh my God, that is a box of frogs, honestly. Oh, it is funny.

Speaker 1: 9:27

I love the whole sort of stories and language thing. It's just mad, isn't it? Yeah, it is, it is all the time. And hey, like we were just talking about, like, how people, people don't want to hear or listen to what they say. Either do they, oh god, no, no, they so don't want to hear or listen to what they say. Either do they, oh God, no, no, they so don't want to hear. And I guess we're all a bit like that, aren't we? Because we don't? Well, because, firstly, we like and I think we talked about this last time, didn't we? We exaggerate the stories. Yeah, we love a bit of exaggeration, don't we? Yeah, makes us all feel a bit better, and then we just tell ourselves a load of crap. Anyway, yeah, which is not true. This is hilarious and that's it.

Speaker 1: 10:14

And nobody ever wants somebody else to point out the truth, do they? Or ask that question, is that really true? Yeah, because it's very uncomfortable. It is really uncomfortable to sit in that, and it's really uncomfortable when you hear somebody ask you that question, yeah, or kind of take it in that direction as to whether you're actually, you know, yeah, saying the whole truth.

Speaker 1: 10:42

Obviously, there's, there's always an element of truth in it, but isn't it, you know? But it's the bits you've added and taken away. We blame the subconscious for doing that because it, like, deletes and distorts, doesn't it? Yeah, but actually we actually do a lot of that ourselves. Oh God, yeah. Which, I then think, which feeds the subconscious, doesn't it?

Speaker 1: 11:06

Basically, because if we're telling our story ourselves, that story all the time, well, then that becomes, that becomes the truth, that becomes, yeah, our belief, doesn't it? Yeah, because, like you say in it, when we tell ourselves the same thing repeatedly, the brain doesn't know the difference between wrong or real or fake. No, which we've said many times before. So then it believes that that's the truth. Yeah, because we've repeated that again and again and again, yeah, and then we actually believe that, yes, yeah, we believe that that's the truth. Yeah, until you actually sit down and think, right, okay, how much of that is actually true? If I break that down, somebody says to you yeah, is that actually? And we'll swear blind for a little while that, yes, that's actually the truth. But if you're made to really sit and pick it to pieces and and I realized that I can't remember what we were doing, but we were doing some work, weren't we? And that was a big realization for me, because I'd spent my whole.

Speaker 1: 12:16

I was and I've said this before I was sort of an angry teenager. I'm very angry with my dad for different reasons. Stories, hear them, stories, um, and I don't know whether it's you or asked me, or when we were doing some work with somebody, and it was like somebody said about the connection of with me and my dad and I said, oh, we didn't really connect, we didn't really get on, and somebody pushed it, but you did. I was like no, we didn't. And I was like I was adamant, like no, I didn't, no, I didn't. And then that that went down the path of actually picking to pieces that story that I didn't connect with my dad. We never really did anything together.

Speaker 1: 13:00

Um, and when I went back and sat with it, actually I did a lot with my dad. I I mean for a start, all through growing up, because I was like I was a real tomboy every sunday. My dad was a goalkeeper. Till he was like 45 years old, I went to football every sunday to watch my dad play football every sunday. It's funny, isn't it? We used to go go to my family once a week, me and my dad, every Thursday evening. It's always at, you know, every year always take me to pretty fair on the Thursday night every year. But yeah, I mean, yeah, I went to, but it didn't fit your narrative that you wanted that you and your dad didn't have a connection.

Speaker 1: 13:52

No, because it was easy to blame because I needed to be angry with him. Yeah, because that, like you said, that was easier. Yeah, so I couldn't have that connection and be angry with him, could I? So it's, but I actually, in time, believed that totally. Yeah, sadly, and it had a huge effect on our relationship. But it wasn't the truth. It's interesting, isn't it? Yeah, and my dad's not no longer with us anymore.

Speaker 1: 14:31

I mean, it, had he been, I could have probably put a little bit of that right, but I mean, that's, it's part of the process, isn't it as such? But I look back it on now and I have a better connection with my dad now, even though he's not here. But I can have that better connection with him because I've accepted that the stories I was telling myself were not true. This is it, isn't it? That's not to say there weren't still bits I was angry with him about. That was still there, but I didn't have that overpowering pace of having those stories that I was telling myself, which just added to my hurt. Yes, you know, because, bless him, he's not here now. It's not hurting him, is it? No, but it. But it was my, so it was my hurt, and I think that that's the thing. I think.

Speaker 1: 15:39

I think we don't realize the impact that those stories have on us. Well, no, because it wasn't until somebody made me really, really think about it, but I even began to unpick it, yeah, and realized that actually what I was saying wasn't true and that's like, oh, that's really uncomfortable, but it is, isn't it? Because I don't think, like you say, because that story fits the narrative for you and has for so long, you know, unless that person had challenged you, you would have died still believing that same thing. Yeah, yeah, sadly, but, like you say, we don't like to be challenged because it. But I think that challenge takes us out of our comfort zone, like you say, because we become comfortable and we believe what we're saying, and I totally believed it. I had to be challenged to then pick at it, to not believe, to yeah, to not believe it and actually to pick out what was the truth.

Speaker 1: 16:45

I do, however, think there are also some stories where I've known haven't really been true, but because you've recited that story, you're not going to then go excuse me. Um, actually that's not quite right. I've been telling porkies all these years, is it? No, you are right. Yeah, you're right. There are some that we don't realise, that we almost just get carried away and believe our own stories and until we're forced to look at the reality, we don't. But I do think there are also stories that deep down, we know are not quite true. Yeah, but because we've told that for so long, or we just believe that ourselves for so long, we don't question ourselves and go come on, you know that's not really true. That's the thing, isn't it? I think there is, you know, and I think until you start challenging yourself in what you're saying, you don't like. You say you just don't think about it. No, you know. No, it's funny, it's just mad.

Speaker 1: 18:01

For me, it's always, like I've said before in a video and stuff like that, about that one I've always been a big person. Yeah, do you know what I mean? I've always been a big person. Yeah, do you know what I mean? I've always been a big girl. Well, actually, that's not always been the truth. You know, I've been bigger than I've been now and I've been smaller than I've been now. Yeah, so that that always thing is not true, is it? No, it's a word, isn't it? It is that, like we said last time, when it that always? No, it's that word, isn't it? It is that, like we said last time, wasn't it that always word? But it's.

Speaker 1: 18:32

But because that now just rolls off, I don't think about it, it just rolls off my tongue really easy, and I don't, and I do it in such a blasé fashion. But that blasé fashion in my head thinks that I don't, it's not really affecting me. Well, also, that blasé fashion means you don't have to deal with that. Yes, well, I've always been a big girl, so I'm always going to be one. Yeah, so then you're putting those words always there, so it's a blasé thing that then I don't have to deal with it if I say that.

Speaker 1: 19:11

But it's, that's true, it's it. It's just made me really think over the past few weeks and how I've been trying to sort of, like you say, you know, get, take some responsibility for my health, and stuff like that. But yeah, it's just like you say, that blase fashion that I say it in thinking, I say that, but it doesn't really affect me. But actually that's not true either. Funny, isn't it? Yeah, but I know, you know, like you say oh, you know, yeah, I'm not bothered, I'm not bothered. Oh, I think that's a really good one that we, we all do that. Oh well, don't bother me. Does it? Deep down? You're absolutely panning it, it's like because it does bother you, yeah, it does, but because you've always said that, yeah, you're not gonna admit. Do you know what? Actually? Because how many of us actually do that? Well, do you know what? Actually, it doesn't bother me really. That's the thing. No, we don't say that out loud, yet inside, we know the really. That that's true. It's like you say, it's that whole contradictory nature. Like you say, with the whole, but also in a blasé fashion.

Speaker 1: 20:24

I've always said my, my sizes never stopped me doing anything. That's true. It's has never stopped me doing anything, that's true. It's also never stopped me doing anything, yeah. But so I almost what's the word? I can't think of the word, I'm trying to think, but I almost make it acceptable by adding that extra bit to it by saying but it's never stopped me doing anything, yeah, so then it doesn't. It's never stopped them doing anything. Yeah, yeah, so that then it doesn't, it's, it's not an issue, no, so it almost becomes acceptable for that, mind you saying I need to tell you this story. I meant to tell you this earlier, but I need to say this.

Speaker 1: 21:04

Okay, yesterday went shopping in a well-known budget supermarket yesterday and I've got to say, the worst of humanity was out yesterday. You know, when you go in a supermarket you're thinking, fuck, I really wish I'd stayed at home. It was like that yesterday. Well, anyway, and but definitely like the, the, almost like people, pleaser, don't say anything. Person came out until she got into the car park but, um, when I went through the checkout, there was a chap and his wife behind me. His wife was in a mobility scooter and I was packing me, shopping away as they're shoving it through the scanner at like 20 miles an hour. You can't. Um, anyway, um, and I paid. So he then said to his wife go on through out the way. You went out the way. And so she scooted out past me and and stood by, sat by the window and as I went to turn my um trolley and walk, he thought it was a joke and he went wide load coming through.

Speaker 1: 22:30

Now she wasn't a small lady, but she wasn't as big as me and I thought, fuck, is he saying that at me or her? Because I'm not with her. I'm on that verge of going. Do I turn around you and tell you a fucking twat and cause a scene in this supermarket, or do I just like let it go? I was like, no, let it go. So I walked on and then, as I drove out, but that point, I'm like do I go back in? You need to sit, because then I go, oh, you've not said anything. You've not said anything. You should have said something. And um, they were. They were just packing up the car and I drove and I, I caught her eye and I smiled, but she almost gave me that.

Speaker 1: 23:14

You know, that helped me smile. She was just like do I just get out and rescue her now and tell her she can divorce him? Because I was like it, it was, but again, it's that, it's that language. He obviously thought he was being funny. Yeah, but that's not funny when it's at the expense of. It's not funny if that was the expense of her. No, clearly not. And she clearly didn't find it funny because I looked at her when he said it. So she clearly didn't find it funny. And if he was aiming that at me, then I just think it's a good job. It was me and it wasn't somebody else who might have just turned around and like lapped him. Yeah, it's a shame he didn't say something. I should have said that. You should have just that. You should have just said are you, is that a me, or yeah? I wish I'd done that now, but I was. Yeah, I didn't.

Speaker 1: 24:16

Sometimes you have to question people. I think you don't have to be rude about it. No, that's the thing, and that's the thing. I wouldn't have been rude about it, but again, it's that. Do I question it? Do I not quite? Do you know what I mean? Yeah, it's just, but this is it, isn't it? There's no reason why. No, if you're in doubt about something, there's no reason why you can't ask and say excuse me, was that comment directed at me or somebody else? You're just asking yeah, this is it, isn't it. But we're we go into a whole programming thing, don't we? Because we're programmed to believe we can't. That's it, isn't it.

Speaker 1: 24:57

There is also the other issue that I think, when we are totally comfortable in our own skins, we do question, and I think that's it. When we're not totally 100% comfortable, all these other things flag up, don't they? Whereas actually, if you were just comfortable, go excuse me, was it? Yeah, were you talking about me or somebody else? Yeah, that's the thing, isn't it? And that made me think again yesterday. Okay, where am I comfortable about me? And do you know? So, yeah, yeah, and again, that language, the fact that I didn't use language to ask that question.

Speaker 1: 25:38

You know, or speak up and you know, yeah, it's really because there's a lot, there is a lot of anger out there, but when people are angry at other people, it's only because they're angry at themselves. Everything that comes out your mouth is a reflection of what is inside of you. So I think that just goes to show we are very much a society that isn't comfortable with ourselves. Yeah, because we wouldn't be comfortable with saying things out loud, because we wouldn't One, we wouldn't be saying them in a malicious way. Anyway, it would just be a question of yeah, you know, are you talking to me or, yeah, are you talking to somebody else? You know, but if, what and what? Because you would, you would ask that question. Yes, but when people aren't comfortable with themselves. They don't.

Speaker 1: 26:27

And then you get the people that aren't comfortable with it says, and then it comes as an angry like are you fucking talking to me? Yeah, which then you're on the house when they go oh, no, yeah, this is it, isn't it? Yeah, so, like you say, it's, it's just really interesting how you do use it or you don't use it or how. But there's also an awful lot of programming in there as well. Yeah, and how you that, like you say, the language, like we said, isn't it the language that we use, is a reflection on how we feel. Yeah, yeah, and I don't think.

Speaker 1: 27:05

Well, and, like we've just said, and unless that's challenged, I don't think we ever think about that. No, no, because I think there's a whole generation coming through now and they're getting labeled as being, um, what's the word? I can't think of the word but but the, the younger generation, are coming through that that they are a more open and comfortable with themselves. So they do question other people, they do say out loud, but then they're, they're getting labeled as I can't think of the word but they're challenging yeah, yeah, whereas actually that this is good because people should be comfortable in their own skin, what, whatever that is and be able to use those words and question other people. I question other people's language, and I think that that is, isn't it? And I think we should be able to challenge things that we don't necessarily agree with, but but doing that in a fashion that allows for that conversation, for there not being any rebuttal, for you not agreeing no, but this is the thing, isn't it?

Speaker 1: 28:12

The rebuttal comes from when it's uncomfortable for yourself, so it then comes, sparks out in anger. This is like you say, it's like a defence, isn't it? Yeah? Or like you say you know you take things. You know you can't just have a conversation with somebody, an uncomfortable conversation with them, without you know somebody saying that's upset me, but rather than saying that people just don't take things on board and sit with it and work out why that it and work out why that. Like you say, as long as it's not said in a malice, malicious way, if you're just having a conversation with somebody and you disagree, you can, you're allowed to disagree on things and not change your relationship with that person now, but it? But when people aren't comfortable within, then it becomes.

Speaker 1: 29:08

They then take it on a personal level. That's the problem, isn't it? Yes, so, whatever language that is spoken in, then they are taking it in on a personal level. So then that changes, yeah, and then that also changes, and I know it does for me. That also changes. Then what I say yes, yes, because that person has said, you know, oh, I don't agree with that, or that's made upset me or that's made me feel uncomfortable. So for me, I know, on a personal level, I will not then say what I want. I would want to say and have a conversation with to try and help, because the people pleaser in me doesn't want to upset people. Do you know what I mean? Or, yeah, and it's never like say you know, it's never done in a malicious, malicious way. People or people, people.

Speaker 1: 30:05

It's like there's an old saying isn't people will hear what they want to hear? Yeah, they do, and that's the thing, isn't it? And again, isn't it that with the stories we tell, we only hear what we want to hear in that story, that we say yeah and we only say what? Well, we only see what we want to say yeah, within that story as well, yes, yeah, yeah. So it's, it's really fascinating that impact it has on us. Yeah, oh god, absolutely, we're never really aware until we're challenged on that.

Speaker 1: 30:36

No, and the like, like, like you were saying, the language we use within those stories has a huge impact. Yeah, you know? Oh, I've always been. That's it, isn't it, but that's like always. I haven't always that one word, but be also, because my mind doesn't know the difference between fake and real. I have generally the majority of my life being bigger, because that's what I've told myself. I've always gonna, I've always been. Yeah, so therefore it becomes that self-fulfilling prophecy, like we said last time. So you have to be really mindful, and the only way of being really mindful about what you're saying is to really look at what it is you're saying and challenge yourself in what you're saying. And, like you say, it's uncomfortable and you don't really want to do it.

Speaker 1: 31:33

No, and also, when you're challenging yourself, then there's all other implications, because that guy in the supermarket obviously wanted to feel a little bit of significance, didn't he? So he's then using language that makes him he thinks makes him more significant. Yeah, actually, in the real world. It doesn't make him look that way at all. No, it makes him look a twat. Yeah, yeah, exactly, doesn't it? Do you know what I mean, he wanted to make himself feel better. Me and his other half just thought he was a twat. Yeah, it's just this. Rose-tinted glasses, isn't it? That's it. He put his rose-tinted glasses in that conversation and god knows what the young lad on the light, the checkout, thought I didn't look at it, you know, but that's the thing, isn't it? You don't again, isn't it?

Speaker 1: 32:27

It's those flippant, blasé comments that we say yeah, that we don't realize the impact that that has no on ourself and others. Yeah, yeah, and our just life in general, yeah, especially if we say them all the time. Yeah, absolutely. It's such a complex mixture, isn't it? Yeah, of feelings, programming, the language, the stories. I love the stories, isn't it? Like you say, until you look, you just don't think. But it is really funny If you start doing it honestly, like, like we've said, just with that word always, yeah, when you say a sentence or something, just to really think about what you've just said, because it's so funny, you go.

Speaker 1: 33:18

You know that, yeah, that always happens, does it what? Every what? Every single time that happens, you go what? And this is a conversation you're having with yourself. Well, I know not every single time, but you just said always. You just said that always happens. So that's every single time. I know not every single time, just now and again. So it's happened now and again. Well, it might have happened once. It's like a lot of things, and then it doesn't become a big deal. Does it deal? Does it hilarious when you actually can unpick it yourself and you think what the fuck am I talking about? That's it. It's really made me brilliant.

Speaker 1: 33:57

You messaged yesterday didn't you go, and what you've been up to? And I'd had a like really busy morning. So I like ran it off the slide. I've done this, this, this, this, this and this, and I went to write I'm fucking knackered. And then I thought, let me think about this. I'm not fucking knackered, am I? I feel knackered, I not am fucking knackered. I'm not quite ready for the knackers yard yet not quite, but I, but it did. It stopped me because I went to type that and I did, and I thought, no, because that's not the truth. I am not knackered, I feel knackered. Now I've just typed all that out and I've realised what I've done all morning, but I'm not knackered.

Speaker 1: 34:45

Well, they're the two biggest words, aren't they? But that's it. Like a bit of I am yeah. Well, they're the two biggest words, aren't they? But that's it like a bit of I am yeah, but again, it's a blasé sentence that we don't have any thinking about what that means with the words we put out. No, it's a blasé sentence about what we use and believe to be true, yeah, which is bollocks. It is all bollocks. Yeah, yeah, so, yeah, honestly, I question stuff all the time.

Speaker 1: 35:11

Now, lately, because we're doing it for the month, it's just made me really think about it. It is so funny, so funny. You say so and it's amazing what just comes out your mouth and you sit going. Well, I just said that, yeah, that's it like. I say, why did I just say that? Yeah, it's just made me really think about everything that comes out of my mouth. But it's funny when you're, when you're listening to other people as well. I'm thinking, yeah, I wonder if that's really true. Why are they? I'm just a nosy bitch. People need to say that. And I go is that true? Now, now, let's get.

Speaker 1: 35:53

And then I've gone down in my head in a whole like deep and dirty as to how, where that's come from, and absolutely sometimes it's not good knowing all this stuff. You know, I know you've dissected everything, just literally one word, and you've dissected a whole like 20 years worth of trauma. That's it. One word can change so much in so many ways. One word, that's the thing, isn't it? I had this random thought the other day, fucking scary, I know, I know, I had this random thought the other day, looking scary, I know, I know.

Speaker 1: 36:34

But like with the English language, right, you think they'd say it's not the hardest language to learn. They recommend Mandarin, chinese is. I can understand that, but there are english. The english language has the most words to learn, right, okay, but if you think things like wandering, okay, it can be spelt two different ways and means two different things. How we ever learn to read, I don't know. See, that's what I thought.

Speaker 1: 37:06

And the word read. So you think of the word read. How many meanings does that have? Yeah, it's spelt the same way, yeah, but it has several different meanings, yeah, and I just think where was I going with that? I don't know, I don't need to find out, but just how that does, like you say, sentences or words we say has many different things, so what it would mean to you might mean something different to me in a sentence.

Speaker 1: 37:39

There's that whole video, isn't there? About the word fuck, oh God, and the many, many meanings yes, and the many, many meanings yes, of how you say it, what it means, what you put it next yeah, the same word, it's just the same word. So many different things, and yeah, but it is, isn't it? Honestly, if you're not seeing that video, go find it on youtube. I can't remember the guy, is it? I can't think what he's called, sahandra or something, something like that, but he's a, so funny. Is he a monk or something? But anyway, it's flipping hilarious.

Speaker 1: 38:23

It is hilarious, but again in it I know we've shared it before um, on a post, but it's the word shit in it, like shit happens. Yeah, it gives a shit, it gives a shit. Yeah, I was funny enough. I was reading that again the other day. It's just hilarious, but it is. But it's true, it's one word, yeah, but the way you put it means so many different things.

Speaker 1: 38:46

Yeah, and I don't know whether you're down bad, yes, for both of those words. Yes, yeah, that's it, isn't it? Yeah, it's so funny, but we do that a lot with yes, with um, the British, yeah, and I don't know whether it's the same in other languages? I don't know, but I don't. But it just made me think about, when we speak and say things, how many different meanings that can have depending on who's in the room and who you're saying it to. Yeah, and also maybe think then, when you were talking about that and other languages sorry, butted in do you remember we were listening to that ted talk with that woman about language? Oh yeah, and they were talking about bridges. But in one language a bridge is masculine, so they see it as strong, yes, oh yeah. And then in another language it's feminine and they look at it as I can't remember what they looked at it. So in those two different languages or cultures it's viewed differently because of it being like a masculine or feminine word. Yeah, I have to find that, because that was really interesting actually, wasn't it? Yeah, that was really interesting, actually, wasn't it? Yeah, how? Then it's seen totally different just because of how that. So it's got to be something like that in other languages. If that happens then isn't it? Yeah, but we don't have the maths in a feminine, we just have one word that means five different things, even though it's spelt the same way, yeah, which must be really confusing for people I never know.

Speaker 1: 40:34

When we were doing lockdown, I was doing spellings with my granddaughter and I was like what, how the hell do I teach her to spell that? Because I see it and say it. It's like it's not even anything like spelling it. No, that's the thing, isn't it? You know, right, what we'll do is we'll find those youtube videos and we'll put them on the bottom of this podcast so that you can, right, remind me. Don't, don't, let me forget. Okay, that's what I said we'd do. We'll put the links to the two YouTube, to that TED talk and like, the TED talk was really interesting, the fuck one, just because it'll make you giggle on there. So we need to find that and I'll put them in the bottom so you can watch it. Oh, that's a good idea. We'll do that too. But if we don't do that, people, you need to remind us.

Speaker 1: 41:31

Well, I'm now absolving me and tracy of all responsibility onto you. What could do with me? I'm so cold. I told them to do it. There's so much you can do with this language exactly. So we leave these gorgeous folks to it. Yeah, I think we better have to just um mashing on today. Have a fabulous rest of your day. Bye.